Blonde quickies 1-20

Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted!Q: How do blonde braincells die ? A: Alone.Q: How do you brainwash a blonde? A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down.Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence.Q: How does a blonde part their hair? A: (Action of scissoring legs apart)Q: Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink? A: Because, that’s where you’re supposed to wash vegetables!Q: What was the blond psychic’s greatest achievment? A: An IN-body experience!Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain? A: After a dye job.Q: Why is the blonde’s brain the size of a pea in the morning? A: It swells at night.Q: Why didn’t the blonde want a window seat on the plane? A1: She’d just dyed her hair. A2: She’d just blow dried her hair and she didn’t want it blown around too much.Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up? A: To catch as much as they can that is over their heads.Q: Why is it good to have a blonde passenger? A: You can park in the handicap zone.Q: Why is a blonde like a turtle? A: When they’re on their backs, they’re screwed.Q: A blonde is walking down the street with a pig under her arm. She passes a person who asks “Where did you get that?” A: The pig says, “I won her in a raffle!”Q: What’s a blonde’s favorite nursery rhyme? A: Humpme Dumpme.Q: Why did the blonde want to become a veterinarian? A: She liked kids…Q: How do you make a blonde’s eyes light up? A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.Q: Why do blondes like lightning? A: They think someone is taking their picture.Q: Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks? A: It takes too long to retrain them.Q: Why don’t blondes make good pharmacists? A: They can’t get the bottle into the typewriter.